Have you ever stayed up waiting for a telephone call?
I’ve fallen in love, big proper love, three times. There’s a box full of cassettes in my mother’s attic with associated tunes that if I was to listen to without distraction I’d be transported back to those days in the 80s, to my first love and the days that the sun always shines (on TV). Music played an important part in falling in love and being a hopeless romantic Piscean dreamer I hear a song and I think of someone.
As well as being in love 3 times I’ve known what love is 3 times. I can’t describe baby love, it’s like heart thumping love with tiredness, but without the romantic music. The love I feel for my children is like no other love. When they were born I almost felt myself roaring and each time I bent down to smell them I was both leaving my scent and breathing in the heady aroma of new baby. Perfect skin, tiny little hands that either flailed around hopelessly, gently kneading me whilst feeding or being looked at in wonderment.
And in times of doubt have you ever tried to work it out?
I love my friends regardless of what they look like, what they wear, say or do. There’s times I don’t like things that they do or say but I don’t stop loving them. It takes a lot for me to fall out with people and when I do I grieve for them and a small part of my heart freezes.
The word love is a funny one. It can mean so many many things to so many people but to me true love goes hand in hand with happiness, acceptance, wonderment and awe. The people I love and whose love I bask in is unconditional, all encompassing and there, just there.